Omake Central
by The Ghostly Minion
Summary: A Collection of Omakes inspired by Harry Potter stories. read Introduction for more details.
1. Chapter 1

Welcome to _Omake Central_! In here will be found all my Omakes I will write for the various stories that have caught my fancy. The only exceptions would be the rare one that for one reason or another convinced me that it should stand alone.

The collection's overall rating will be 'M', as there will be deaths and for language, note NOT for explicit sex scenes. The individual entries will have further topic listings to give you an idea of its content.

I hope you'll enjoy.

 _ **The Ghostly Minion**_


	2. Our Version of Events : Best Man

**OMAKE CENTRAL**

 **OUR VERSION OF EVENTS  
THE BEST MAN'S SPEECH**

 **A/N: This omake takes the place of Chapter Ten of Potato 19's story (ID: 11840916), with the difference that Hermione and Bennet actually marry. Therefore, Harry is forced to give a Best Man's speech and toast. It doesn't go according to the 'happy' couple's expectations, nor the mother of the groom's, nor the guests.** **Big Thanks to reader , who caught the typo.**

 **Harry Potter /Angst, Horror**

Harry looked on as Father Rose conducted the ceremony, wedding the woman he had loved with the brother in whose shadow he'd always lain. His thoughts went back to the day before Bennet returned to England.

He'd tried to achieve closure with Hermione. He started by apologizing for the rocky manner in which he'd proxied for Bennet and the stress she'd felt from his ineptitude. He tried to wish her well, to tell her that he was moving on from her and he was happy for her and Bennet. But he lost control, and ended by kissing her with all the love for her the last few weeks had revived in him. She accepted that kiss, and disengaged, reminding him that she was Bennet's, now and forever.

On the night of Bennet's return, he and Hermione met with him and Bennet thanked him for standing in. Hermione kissed him on the cheek and Apparated to Potter Manor. Bennet stayed and had words with him. What Bennet had to say shook him to the core. Any hypothetical respect for Bennet he might have had was gone. Any respect he'd had for _Hermione_ was gone. After all, she'd known the sort of person Ben was and still wanted him.

That night, he slept alone for the first time in weeks. To be sure, Cho had been there. She'd left after he'd told her to leave and never come near again, on pain of being Obliviated back to the age of three.

Next day, he spent the day at the Department of Mysteries and then at the _Daily Prophet_. Rita Skeeter had never paid any attention to Harry; after all, Bennet was always the big story. This time, she was quite interested in Harry's story and proofs. Readily, they came to an agreement that would see the biggest story of Rita's career carried in every English language magical newspaper and magazine. Harry chuckled sardonically at how Luna would react when it ran in the _Quibbler_. He'd never understood the basis of her hatred for him, but the irony was so delicious! He'd had a quite meal near his flat and had a sound night's sleep. Granted, he received a bollocking from Lily when he got to the manor in the morning.

So, until the day before, he worked like a Trojan. Lily was told in no uncertain terms that the day before the wedding was his day off. On that day, he'd picked up a unique bolus he'd ordered in Knockturn Ally, under a glamour. He also met with the Unspeakable who would attend the festivities and Rita, assuring her Potter Manor wasn't warded against animagi.

– **BMS –**

Lily got a modicum of revenge by driving him from pillar to post, handling all the myriad of last-minute details common to any large wedding. The revenge was thwarted somewhat by his tactic of tossing the problems back on the wedding planner and her aides. It worked out fine though; they figured it out for themselves and now he stood on Bennet's left as Hermione became Mrs. Bennet Potter. Oddly, though he did feel a dull ache at the loss of opportunity—as much his fault as Bennet's and hers (to a lesser extent), it had none of the heart-rending agony he thought he'd have, as little as ten days before.

The wedding party processed through the manor's hall and back around to the head table. There, the festive meal was consumed. He couldn't tell anyone how it tasted; he just ate enough. Though from the looks of the others, the meal he and Hermione chose was ambrosial.

– **BMS –**

After the forty-five or so minutes it took for the company to eat and grow ready for the toast and the cutting of the wedding cake, he took the bolus with the last of his water, stood and tapped a spoon on his champagne flute. The onlookers stilled.

He looked out at the throng and noted the faces. There were friends, people whom he'd grown to love: Neville, Hannah, Remus, clients who'd stood by the firm and others. He saw Bennet's friends, Weasley, Zabini, Krum, Edgewater, Fortesque, former disgruntled clients and employees, and Dumbledore. Finally, he saw the wedding party, those for whom he felt greater or lesser amount of loathing. That is, with the exceptions of Michael Granger and his younger daughter Sarah, the bridesmaid.

"Some in the family went to significant lengths to ensure that I'd stand before you today in this capacity. To them, I have to say, 'don't try so hard, you might succeed'." Everyone started and stared at him, some with a half-hearted chuckle, most suspiciously.

He smirked to himself, enjoying the utter hatred he felt coming from Luna. "I've heard said that our honored guest, Albus Dumbledore is wont to say, 'The truth is a beautiful and terrible thing, and should be treated with great caution'. I think I'll prove that today."

He placed a bowl-like object on the table. "I've been to the Department of Mysteries at the Ministry. There, they examined my memories and placed three in this pensieve after certifying them as accurate and complete. I now swear on my life and magic that the memories here are mine and complete and accurate. So mote it be!" The blinding light of his oath's acceptance flashed and with a careless wave he produced his Patronus.

– **BMS –**

He tapped the pensieve and a visual display appeared for all to view. They saw Hermione Apparate away and Bennet turn to face his brother.

" _So, it all worked better than I even thought it could. Of course I knew you were still in love with her. How couldn't you be? We're enough alike that I know you had to be; I would in your place. Well, having you in my place, while I was off in Bulgaria on business worked better than even I hoped. Your love for her is rekindled into an inferno. I fancy I feel the heat radiating from you. And now, you'll have to bottle it all up and stand by when she becomes Mrs. Bennet Potter. I prove to you again, I'm the light, you're the shadow and you'll_ _ **never**_ _be anything more!_

" _Got another thing for you to think about. Hermione won't be a virgin on our wedding night. Oh, I know_ _ **your**_ _scruples. You'd kill to do what I've already done with her. Too late, too little as usual. By the way, you've not missed much, she's a lousy lay. I've had many better, including your so-called girlfriend. At school, after we left Hogwarts. Three weeks ago, when she was on 'assignment'. There is_ _ **nothing**_ _you have or ever will have I can't take away."_

– **BMS –**

The hall filled instantly with susurrations of shock and dismay. For once, Harry noted amusedly, Luna's splenic glare was directed at Bennet. The bride was an astounding shade of umber. Her father and sister were held back by Sirius Black from attacking the groom.

Harry found himself enjoying the moment as he looked over the guests. He noted the blasé air of Bennet's cronies and wondered how this news had been covered up. Then he briefly pondered on what it was about Bennet that ever could inspire such loyalty.

"I suppose that erodes some of the splendor from 'The-Boy-Who-Lived'. Well, seemingly." Again, the bemused articulations of the guests filled the hall.

"24 June, 1995. A date all here know. For me, to paraphrase President Franklin Roosevelt of the States, 24 June, 1995, A date that will lived in infamy."

Again the pensieve was tapped and they saw the third task of the TriWizard play out from the time Harry came across Delacour and Krum, until he reached the center of the maze, where he blacked out. Harry stopped the playback.

"At this point, Bennet stunned me. I've never really bothered to ask why, but I'm sure he intended to appear at the podium outside the maze with the Cup and me to rub in his victory and my failure. But as you know, we went somewhere else."

Tapping the Pensieve again, they saw Harry and Bennet before the wraith of Voldemort, Bennet swearing it was Harry's blood they wanted. Voldemort's horrific anger when they took Bennet's blood instead and he reanimated in a misshapen body. The congregation of DeathEaters, and Voldemort's boasting speech. Then having Bennet freed to duel the monster.

Then, Bennet successfully begging out, reminding them Harry was the real Boy-Who-Lived. Then Harry being freed, dodging Unforgivable Curses, returning a few hexes. Then, an eye-searing flash of white and darkness.

Finally, awakening in the Hospital Wing. In a sort of cosmic mockery, he got the news of Bennet's greatest 'triumph' from his 'girlfriend', Cho Chang.

– **BMS –**

The hall was silent. Its weight seemed thick and murky, like the worst of the old-time fogs in London. Everyone's mien bore a look of stunned incomprehension. Their world hadn't simply spun 180º; rather, it had been turned inside-out. If something this fundamental was a lie, then in what could anyone anchor reality? Harry simply took in the vista and wondered who would reboot first.

Eventually, time resumed its course. One of the first was Dumbledore. His dawning look of horror, mixed with shame aroused in Harry vindictive feelings which he enjoyed. The old man had been one of his prime antagonists from Halloween evening 1981 on.

"We need to move along. We're all still hungry for that cake, right?" The sarcasm in the question made a goodly number there flinch.

"The last of my memories is really the ghost of horrors past. We've retreated further and further into the past; the horrors of the present, horrors of the medium past and now the nativity of horrors. Don't worry, there are future horrors too, yet to come.

"Some of us have had the misfortune of a close encounter with Dementors, as I had in third year. I don't know what, if anything in the way of terrible memories appeared to Bennet. For me, they dredged up the memories of the day my place in the world was set in stone. 31 October, 1981." The pensieve was tapped a final time.

" _Run Lily, I'll hold him off!" The sounds of a battle and spells cast. A high-pitched voice crying 'Stupefy Maximus!' Then the sound of someone racing up the stairs. A door slamming open and a woman's shriek of fear._

" _I have no quarrel with you, Lily Potter. Your husband is only stunned, for I try to keep those of pure blood alive. As much as I grieve his choice of wife, I shall allow you to live. Your sons though, cannot be suffered to live, they are children of prophecy and must die before they become a threat."_

" _No, please! Be merciful to my boys and let them live!"_

" _The only mercy I have for them is a painless ending. Now, step aside."_

" _No, please, let my angel, Bennet live. Kill Harry if you must, I know he won't amount to anything anyway."_

" _Such a fearless and loving mother. Never let it be said that Lord Voldemort has no mercy. AVADA KADAVRA!"_

 _The sound of an explosion. Then nothing._

– **BMS –**

One might have thought that the guests would be again stunned, but the resounding **Slap!** of Sirius Black's hand to Lily Black's face roused the throng. As did his bellow as he strode out of the hall, "I am disgusted to think I married you. My representatives will file the divorce papers Monday morning!"

"Now, all of you have seen the truth." Harry's voice overrode the rising mutterings of the audience.

"In the interest of full disclosure, every English language magical newspaper and magazine will carry this story tomorrow. By Tuesday at the latest it will be in all languages. The Unspeakables will have the memories available to all magicals tomorrow, all over the world."

Turning his attention towards the bride, to whom he'd never again address by name. "You knew, or at least suspected the truth, but married him anyway. _'Can an Ethiopian_ _change his skin or a leopard its spots?'_ You knew his character, but still married him."

He looked over and locked eyes with Sarah Granger. "Too late I've realized I gave my heart to the wrong Granger." She blushed and inwardly thrilled at his words. A long-suppressed fancy for Harry inflamed and heated her.

Harry's belly told him it was time. "And now time for the horrors yet to be. Oh yes, and for the toast." He raised the champagne flute. "To the bride and groom, may they burn in Hell for all eternity!"

The flute shattered in his hand. Smoothly, he drew his wand. With a slight flick, Father Rose and the Grangers were moved a dozen feet away from the table. A voiceless _Reducto_ , and his head and neck shattered, spraying the rest of the wedding party with his blood and brains. Good management on Harry's part resulted in his body reseating itself and his blood kept geysering over them.

His wand had dropped from his hand and rolled a few feet away. Unnoticed, Sarah summoned the wand, tucking it under her robe, holding it like a teddy bear. Then, the bolus took effect. The simplest description was that his entire body dissolved into a puddle of goo, partially absorbed by his robes.

– **BMS –**

This last repulsive event was one too far. Pandemonium fell upon all. As the riot escalated, an animagus and an Unspeakable exited.

Back in the Department of Mysteries, one final memory entered the 'Harry Potter pensieve'. As his colleagues began to duplicate the Pensieve, he pondered for a moment, his rôle over, then softly said, "Rest in peace. Harry Potter. You went out in style."

 **A/N: So ends my take on the wedding in Potato 19's story. If you read this without having read the story first, by all means check out the original (ID: 11840916), one of my favorites.**

 **Thank you, for pointing out my typo in the ID for the story.**

 **Huge thanks to my Beta, texan-muggle, who makes sure I've given you something readable.**

 **The Biblical quote is from Jeremiah 13:23, NIV version.**

 **FDR is paraphrased from his December 8, 1941 address, calling on Congress to declare war on Japan.**

 **The idea for the bolus is adapted from a series concerning Dinosaurs living among us today. The main protagonist is a Velociraptor PI. Sadly, I can't find any of the book titles and I've forgotten the author's name. Anyone who remembers this, let me know.**

 **My only compensation for writing is the joy I find in it and you letting me know what you thought of it. Reviews, PMs, C2s, follows and favorites are gold to me.**

 **Date: 09/28/2017  
Words: 2,532**


	3. Chapter 3

**Best Man's Speech, Part Two**

 **A/N: Amusingly, the only review I have so far for my Omake asked for a followup. So, this is it. It's set eighteen months after 'Best Man's Speech'. Reconciliation, Love, Justice.**

The memorial garden in Michael Granger's property Northwest of London was beautiful.

 **Kindly watch this space. TGM**

 **A/N: So ends my takes** **on Potato 19's story,** ** _Our Version of Events_** **. If you read these** **without having read the story first, by all means check out the original (ID: 11840916), one of my favorites.**

 **Huge thanks to my Beta, texan-muggle, who makes sure I've** **given you something readable.**

 **My only compensation for writing is the joy I find in it and you letting me know what you thought of it. Reviews, PMs, C2s, follows and favorites are gold to me.**

 **Date: 00/00/2017  
Words: 134**


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